Sunday, March 21, 2010

Love Like You Have Never Been Hurt

Who ever said, "Love Like You Have Never Been Hurt," has obviously never been hurt. I mean really, who likes to be hurt? I sure don't. In fact I can only count on one hand the number of times I have really been hurt, because I just won't let myself feel that way. I don't like to be hurt, therefore, I prevent myself from being in circumstances where that may be a possibility. Like my previous long distance most of the time, long lasting relationship with an amazing guy. We just communicated enough to keep it going and when things fizzled a bit, there was no hurt, just an "oh, well." Which really is how most of my relationships have been, because, well, that is how it has worked the best for me. But I guess when someone comes along who you want to give it your all and things seem rocky, I get a bit scared of the possibility of being hurt. It is so much easier to be busy and not make it work, because well, that is what I have done thus far, but really is that what is going to bring lasting happiness? Probably not. So my mom said to me today that if things happen to not work out with my current relationship she is really worried that I am going to put up an even thicker wall and no man will ever be able to tear it down. And do you know, mama knows best and is absolutely right. I have learned in my life if the wall is up, it doesn't hurt as bad. You ask, where did that all come from? A friend of mine just put that quote on facebook and I was thinking about it, so I blogged about it. Gave me something to blog about.

However, we did have a wonderful stake conference. I really enjoyed the Saturday night session. I often wonder if people actually go home and change the way they do things after hearing those talks and feeling the spirit which was so strong. I am talking about making sure they have FHE, family scripture study and prayer. I would hope that if I had a family I would already be doing those things as I am while single, but maybe I would be a little more diligent or rather more heartfelt, which is maybe what I need to do myself now. I really enjoyed our Stake Presidents talk. He basically talked to those several couples in the stake who are newly engaged, which of course isn't me, so don't be getting any ideas. He talked about how when you are single and dating you each have a different vision, but as soon as you marry, you should have the same vision. I could totally relate, because it does seem in dating, two people come from two different backgrounds, regardless if you were or weren't raised in the church and it is hard when dating to have the same vision, however, maybe I am just missing the point and in dating you should be focusing on the same things too. I don't know, you would think after dating as much as I have that I would be a pro and would know it all, but I don't and probably never will. The thing that keeps coming back to me was President Bakers statement, "Relationships are a lot of work." Ya think? I sometimes ask myself, is it worth the work? I see my parents and the wonderful relationship that they have and I have to answer, yes, it must be worth it. And so, I guess I will keep trying, even though I think I gave up today...I'll take President Bakers advice and will work a little harder and try to work on that vision thing.

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