This Makes Me Happy

Today I will have a great day, because I woke up to new pictures of the twins. Technology is so great!

Wandering, Lost, Redirected...Whatever You Want To Call It.

There is a framed picture I have on my bookshelf across from where I sit that has a picture of a guy on a road with different forks which reads, "It is truly said it does not take much strength to do things, but it requires great strength to decide what to do." From time to time in my life I have felt like I was wandering or kind of stuck in one place and not moving or not quite sure which path to go down next or maybe which path to continue down. That seems to be where I have felt lately. It is nice to know that I'm not alone in these feeling. Today at work surprisingly I had a few minutes to sit and chat with a coworker that I also consider a friend. We actually don't work with each other very often because she usually works at another hospital and only works 6 days a month, oh what I would give for that schedule. Anyway, she was telling me how she felt exactly like I have been feeling the last few weeks. She is married and has an 18 month old son and said that she use to feel like she had something to always look forward to. I agreed, like when you are in school and you know the semester will eventually end and another one will begin. But once 8 years of school or rather 22 years of school are over and another semester won't start and end you feel like you are doing the same thing over and over again and it isn't changing and really, it can be rather boring. However, Tuesday's quote of the day has continued to stay with me all week. It said, "Each of us possesses moral agency and we have the capacity, through our choices, to determine our destiny. On the other hand, our Heavenly Father is as intimately involved in our lives as we will allow him to be, as closely tied to our daily walk and talk as we permit him to be. Who would not delight in being led and encouraged and empowered along the path of life by One who knows the end from the beginning and can counsel us with perfect knowledge? One great sign of spiritual maturity is the extent to which we strive to be led by the Spirit" Uncle Lloyd aka Lloyd D. Newell. I have pondered over the line Heavenly Father is intimately involved in our lives...That is a pretty powerful statement and such a comfort to me in knowing He won't let me make any major mistakes. I have seen this time and time again as I have looked back on my life when it has come time to make a big decision. He won't make the decision for us, but I know that if we make the wrong decision prayerfully, He will quickly redirect us.
When I was in my undergrad I really wanted to get into the cytology program. I literally suffered through cell biology reading the entire book at least twice, rewriting my notes daily, going to tutoring sessions and actually not even passing the class. It wasn't that I didn't know the information, it was just Heavenly Father's way of letting me know that wasn't what he had planned for me. He knew then that I wouldn't be happy staring in a microscope for 8 hours a day. (I actually kept that book to always remind myself of this learning experience.) At the time I was devastated that I was an alternate to the program and that I was going to have to spend my summer at BYU repeating the class, which the first day seemed 10 times harder than the class at BSU. I can now look back and see that even though I thought I knew what I wanted, Heavenly Father was intimately involved in my life in many more ways than I ever imagined. I quickly realized my first day at BYU that something needed to change so I completely changed my major, enlisted in a 100 level nutrition class which I scored the highest I think I ever did in a class and had one of the best summers of my life with my sister Tenielle and my dear friend Aubrey.
So now when I'm feeling that I need to be redirected, or need a change, or what have you, that I remember the scripture's in D&C 6:19 & 36, "Be patient; be sober; be temperate; have patience, faith, hope, and charity...Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not." He won't let me make a wrong decision, but He will teach me and gently, and I might add patiently, guide my ways. I have also learned that my time isn't necessarily His time. It is during these times I have heavily relied on the scripture Jacob 4:10 "...Seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy over all his works." And then I remember He knows best and I have to be patient, accept His counsel and trust in His plan for me...I came across a quote yesterday that I believe will become my new motto, "Sometimes on the way to our dreams we get lost and find a better one." And so I continue patiently, ever so patiently...

Can You Really Learn A Lesson From A Movie?

Tonight was movie night with the girls and a husband. I was thinking this was going to be a chick flick and he would be like are you serious. Wow, was I totally wrong on this one. I think I will pass from renting from the red box for a while. I don't seem to be choosing very good movies lately. Throughout the entire movie I was thinking this has got to be the worst show ever and if I was home watching it by myself I would have turned it off at the beginning and even voiced this to my friends. However we kept watching it and I think that I learned something very important from it, with the main point being in the last 2 minutes. I'm not quite sure what to do with what I gained, but it did really get me thinking about what is most important in our lives. I know you are asking which movie it was, it was Remember Me. I encourage you to rent it and watch it without your children. I will warn you the language is not good and there is a bedroom scene, but it was PG-13 surprisingly, which isn't an excuse. There were some great lines in the movie some of which follows:

"Gandhi said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it because nobody else will. Like when someone comes into your life and half of you says: "You're nowhere near ready". And the other half says: Make her yours forever."

"Love's involved with spending time together, but spending time apart, can lead to loving even more."

" If you could hear me, I would say that our finger prints don't fade from the lives we've touched."

"Caroline asked me if I knew what I'd say if I knew you could hear me. I told her I know: I love you. I miss you. And I forgive you."

But the best line was at the end and because I don't want to spoil the movie for you I will just have to say, watch it until the very end and let me know what you will change about your life now...Hopefully you won't need to change anything, but it will at least get you thinking about how very precious our time is and how we should treasure every moment with those that are most important to us. Because in the end the number of hours we work in a week or the amount of money we totalled up on our W-2 at the end of the year will never matter as much as the relationships we make today with the ones we love.

Today my mom informed me that my 84 year old honey bee grandpa has taken a terrible turn for the worst in the past few weeks. Up until a year ago he was in perfect health, but over the past year he has been diagnosed with Atrial Fibrillation, Diabetes, Prostate Cancer, and mom said today he has "fluid on his brain." Grandma Betty is a health nut and has always done everything for him including having a perfect healthy course for each meal. When he was diagnosed with Diabetes she made him stop eating sugar cold turkey, even though I know mom has snuck over some of dad's homemade ice cream, which is Grandpa Randy's favorite. He has worked at least 60 hours a week his entire life and traveled the world except for the past few months. I really hope that he hangs on until I can be there the end of August. I never imagined it would happen so fast and makes me want to stop what I'm doing and just go home, but I know that I can't so I will continue to hope and pray something changes for at least another few months. But then again, what is most important now?

Happy Birth Day Bridger and Beckett

I should have posted 6 minutes ago so it would have still been July 7, 2010 but I'm a few minutes late. I'll just think of it as still July 7, 2010...Today was a very exciting day for our family. We welcomed two new addition's to our growing clan. I really never felt so much love in my entire life until I started having nephews and a niece. I wonder if it just has to do with being an adult and having some maturity. I mean I love my family, but the idea of these spirits coming right from our Heavenly Father's arms just is so absolutely amazing and precious to me. I wonder of the potential these children have who are born at this time and why they were saved for the last days. I'm sure they were saved for these days because they were valiant and strong and willing to be warriors in the war between evil and good.
I admit, I actually had a hard time sleeping last night because I was so excited for the event today. And when I woke up this morning it was all I could think about and the fact that I really wished I was home. But, Troy was good to his word and sent pictures! It was funny to hear Troy talk about the births. I mean Troy always acts like he is this macho man, but when it comes to the births of his children he is such a softy. He said, "The first one came out screaming and they said, wow this is a big baby, then the other one came out screaming too and said, wow this is an even bigger baby." Yes, big babies indeed for twins at least. Bridger was 6 pounds 12 ounces and Beckett was 7 pounds 2 ounces. I bet Becky felt a lot lighter after all of that. All are healthy and strong and doing well, which is all we really asked for. It's humbling to me how over the past few months I have been praying and fasting for this and how my faith has been strengthened in knowing that Heavenly Father hears our prayers and He answers them too. Not that I don't already know this but sometimes it's nice to be reminded.

Mom says Gavin isn't quite sure of all of the attention the twins are getting and the fact that he has been the only one for the past 3 years, but I'm sure he will soon adjust. Apparently he cried when they dropped him off this morning and he cried when they left the hospital and he didn't even want to go to his favorite outdoor store Cabella's. He really must have been mad to have turned grandpa's offer down...Oh, he will be loving on them very soon I am sure.