1. This week has been the week for me to take in all that has happened over the past 2 weeks. There was not really any mourning in the hospital. I was too sick and tired for that. Grandma Betty tells me that it is normal and appropriate to cry and cry I do. Some days are worse, but today I feel in control of my emotions and only teared up a little when my aunt Sherry came to curl my hair, but so did she. Grieving means I'll get through this and that I will.
2. Tristen, Tyler, and my cousins Desiree and Callie brought their kids over to swim. It was hard for me not to be able to get in my bathing suit as you know how much I love to do that, but after some tears I had an enjoyable time sitting in the sun watching them. I love all the kids who came to swim. They are so cute. Lucy called me the sick one. It was pretty funny. I loved how Lucy and Aidree held hands like they were best friends, which they are. Lucy is Desiree's daughter. They remind me of the relationship that I have with Alisha who is Desiree's sister.
3. The last 2 days I've been able to get my pain under control with 2 pain pills. I only do it once a day. I try to just take 1 pill but it is nice to not have so much pain with 2.
4. I was cut from my epigastric (upper abdomen) to my pubic line; I know too much information. Just below my belly button there developed an infection when I was in the hospital and they had to take the staples out and pack the area and put me on IV antibiotics. I'm happy to report that it is getting better and I hope we can stop packing it in the next few weeks. Thankfully I am numb in the area, so I can't feel the packing.
5. I saw Dr. Perez this week. My albumin and protein were up which means I can stop the IV TPN and Lipids (nutritional supplements). This is so nice because I had to have them 12 hours a day. I now just have to have a liter of fluids every other day. Next week I will have my picc line taken out and have a procedure where they put a port in my chest. 4 weeks of a picc line is not comfortable. I also meet with the Chemo Dr. next week. A physician from Huntsman Cancer Institute (we had a connection) called and talked to me on Monday. The problem is my insurance doesn't cover them. Hopefully my dr. here and there can converse regarding my treatment.
6. I can now do a few things on my own, bend over to flush the toilet, put my shirt on, and today I got out of bed by myself for the first time. We take so many little things for granted.
7. We have had so many visitors this week. I'm so loved. Someone brought me a sunshine basket that had all things yellow in it. I got a darling package from my friend Pamela who lives in Texas. Each item had a quote or a scripture on it; that made my day. I was also able to talk to her. She is such a good friend. There is an ovarian cancer walk in September in Dallas. It is my goal to be able to walk it with her. The Indian Health Services where I worked in Phoenix sent me the most beautiful bouquet of flowers. It truly has brightened up my week.
8. This week in my scripture reading I read the last chapter of Mormon. It was just what I needed. It talked about miracles, prayer and faith. I felt so much peace after reading it. How grateful I am for the atonement of the Savior Jesus Christ. I know that he not only bore our sins but he knows what it feels like to have ovarian and colon cancer. He has born this burden, which makes me so grateful that someone else knows what it feels like.