Poor Me

I'm having a Poor Me day.  I don't know why.  I have no reason really.  I actually had a slow day of seeing patient for me; only 34.  Maybe it is because I have had more time at work to think about Poor Me and the fact that the clock was ticking so slow, given there is a second provider to help since we have been incredibly busy the last month.  I'm not one to write about Poor Me on my blog, because I'm suppose to always be positive and happy.  I think the Poor Me syndrome is coming from this horrible feeling of not being settled, but truly feeling that things are going to change drastically in the next year.  What the drastic events will be, I'd really like to know NOW (and they better be good, really good), because it is making me a bit anxious and impatient.  I admit some of this is coming from the fact that I was so use to switching shifts rather easily at work in CLT, bunching several shifts together and then being able to take a trip, even if it was only for 4 days.  That just doesn't happen here and it is making me crazy insane, like I might pop a gasket sooner rather than later.  NO ONE will ever switch with me because they don't like to work at my clinic and they will flat out tell me that, which makes me sad for them because it is a great clinic with helpful, wonderful staff; just busy.  The way they do vacations and days off here is so lame it makes me crazy that they aren't even open to how it could be much better like the way we did it in CLT.  And lastly there is no way to bunch shifts, because we don't have PRN's and only 2 PT people.  It is so lame, lame I tell you.  Did I mention I hate working every other Sunday?  It has been nice to have 7 Sundays off in a row (lucky me, thanks to someone who wanted more hours) but I'm back to it this Sunday.  If I make it 358 more days to finish out my contract it will be a miracle in and of itself.  I want to go to Europe so bad this year, but because of the way they do the nutty vacations, it doesn't allow me to have much time off to do so.  I told mom today maybe one day I just won't go to work; so not like me.  I mean what will they do fire me or take my birthday away?  Let's hope the next 2 days off bring me a new attitude before my 3 days weekend...I mean really it is okay to not be happy and positive all the time.  Don't worry, I'll be back for Fabulous Friday!