Yesterday's CT Scan and Blood Tests: All NORMAL! The words REMISSION never sounded so sweet coming from Dr. Dan! At night when I can't sleep, I've played this scenario out in my mind over the past week, but when it came down to it I wasn't sure what to do or how to react, however my relief came as tears of joy. I'm overjoyed that the hardest part of this Journey is over, even though I know there is more to it. Today's news seems all so real, just like it did the day I was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer. It's a relief to have chemo days something of the past, no more weekly needle pokes and to realize that I have made it through one of the hardest obstacles of my life. Yes, there are still hard things that will come like the thought of regrowing my hair, building back my energy and muscle and then going back to work after such a long time off. But the hardest part is over! I did it; We did it. I couldn't have done it without my amazing army of supporters, my family, friends, and strangers. Yes, strangers, like the people who ask me about my treatment while standing in lines at the post office or the supermarket and then who tell me they will pray for me. I testify of the power of prayer; that our Heavenly Father hears and answers our prayers. I have certainly felt his loving arms and spirit of peace encompass me throughout this journey.
I discussed with Dr. Dan that I feel like my abdomen is stretched out like I have just had a baby. His reply, "It's like you've had 6 babies right in a row." Thanks for making me feel a little better. He also reminded me that he pumped me full of steroids and to be patient in letting the chemo and steroids rid themselves from my body. It's not going to be an overnight process, just as it hasn't been an overnight process getting to where I am. After a morning of feeling down about how I look, it helped in knowing I will be able to regain my strength and my shape hopefully soon. I have to remember what I have gone through, that I'm still healing and that I'm not my body or my hair, but so much more.
This morning as I was thinking of my upcoming appointment with Dr. Dan, I ran across this quote which gave me comfort and peace in knowing great things were to come: "Hope has a way of being self-perpetuating. Hope breeds faith. And faith produces miracles." -Tito Momen, from My Name Used to Be Muhammad. How grateful I am for hope, faith and miracles, for I have seen the blessings of them throughout my life, especially over the past 5 1/2 months!
From here I will have tests every 2 months for the first year, port flushes every month and don't forget December 13 will wrap up this years surgery and the last sentence in this chapter of my life.
And so I say Thank You Ovarian Cancer it's been nice knowing you, for making me stronger and better, but now I hope and pray I can say good-bye to you FOREVER!
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